It’s been a while since I created a post. A lot has transpired, including the birth of our son! In another blog post I’ll share some highlights of his birth story, but tonight I want to share some things I’m learning along the way.
Becoming Mommy isn’t the end of spousal romance.
When my husband and I married a little over 2 years ago, we became one flesh literally, and we’re still becoming one as it pertains to figurative and spiritual matters. There is no relationship on this earth that God has designed for two to become one like He has with marriage, not even parenthood. I can look into our son’s beautifully handsome golden face and experience a love that I’ve never felt before, yet it doesn’t replace the love I have for my husband. I love the both of them unconditionally, differently, yet equally.
No matter the demands of our son, we have to keep time for one another. This doesn’t mean his needs will be sacrificed but that we choose to embrace balance early on. Our marital needs and desires don’t fade away because we’re parents, so we have to trust that when God graced us for parenthood, He also graced us to remain intimate with one another–not just sexually either.
Becoming Mommy isn’t the end of my individuality.
Naturally, I am a woman of grace with a commanding presence. My middle name should have been excellence since that’s what I’ve always strived to maintain (an excellent spirit). I am a creative being–I write, draw, sing, dance, play instruments. Whatever I do prospers.
During my pregnancy journey, I felt as though I was losing a significant portion of myself to fear. Fear of the journey, fear of childbirth, fear of what life would become post delivery. I didn’t feel beautiful on most days. I often felt like I didn’t measure up to God’s calling on my life because most of my gifts and talents were placed on the back burner. I was so caught up in my feelings and not enough in my Lord. Yes, raging hormones and the transition back to the South also played a part in it, but I still know that a large portion was my perspective.
Now that my little prince is here, I’m choosing to resume what God has called me to do and embrace my identity in Christ all over again. It’s time for me to put boots on the ground and take charge of the life the Lord has challenged me to live and lead.
Being Mommy doesn’t mean it’s fine to give the Lord a backseat.
Most days I’m tired–my almost three-week-old loves nursing. Being exclusively breastfed, without bottles right now, ensures I’m up at odd hours for feedings and changings.
Even though he’s absolutely adorable and intelligent, my baby watching should not, cannot, and will not replace or interfere with the time I spend in the presence of the One who has entrusted our son into our care. The Lord didn’t have to open my womb–but He did. My quiet time might not resemble any time I’ve had before, but as I choose to seek Him first and keep my heart from idols, I will remain fulfilled and on track with the Lover of my soul.
Trust me, I don’t have it all together, and I won’t pretend that I do, but I know that as long as I hold fast to these three truths, my life as a mom–and everything else–will flow beautifully, purposefully, and graciously.