Mamas, Before You Lose Your Cool, Read This!

“Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away.” 

James 4:14 NASB

This verse is so appropriate for this year! Yet, if you and I are honest, sometimes the lightweight matters seem to creep in and scream for our attention to get us away from what matters.

boy wearing red t shirt and blue pants
Photo by Thgusstavo Santana on

Toddler Tantrums

The other day my almost-four-year-old had the biggest meltdown. He wanted something I told him to wait for, and he pitched a fit. I got flustered because his cries woke up the baby. After a while, I took a mental step back to assess the situation and discovered something. He wasn’t showing out because I told him not right now—he wanted me. I could’ve given him everything he thought he wanted, but he still would’ve had a fit because the cry of his heart was him needing love from mommy.

Unpacking This

He wanted something for which he was to wait.

  • How often are we like this? God says, “Wait a little longer,” but we perceive it as a “no,” and have a fit? If there’s anything we should leave this season and year with, it would be godly patience. However, we shouldn’t twiddle our thumbs and let time pass by, but we should occupy until God’s appointed time has come.

I got flustered.

  • We have a range of emotions we’re permitted to feel—yet, why did I allow my toddler’s action to fluster me? If your little one is flustering you, maybe it’s time to exam yourself to discover the deeper issue. As I began to investigate me, I realized I was upset due to sleep deprivation and that I’ve stopped creatively expressing myself and using my gifts.
  • Honestly, I couldn’t have moved forward without addressing my attitude because I’m the one setting the bar and atmosphere in my home, not my children. Frankly, if I’m not doing something that I sense I should be doing, I can’t blame it on their tantrums. Neither can you. Own it, release it, and go on.

You don’t have time to waste staying in your feelings.

Candace A. Jones

He wanted me.

  • Could your children’s tantrums represent their need for your attention? When I realized that, although I felt like I had nothing in me to give, I gave him my attention and love. Given a chance to see from his perspective—thank You, Lord—allowed me to understand his cry at that moment. Sometimes our busyness can cause us to misinterpret or mismanage the feelings of our children. Whatever we thought was so pressing can wait until we tend to our littles. 
  • God is longing for us, too. Yes, the demands of motherhood and being a wife has its challenges. Yet, we can’t be our best to them or for ourselves if we neglect Him. Plus, God’s wise enough to show us how to pace our days in a way that doesn’t leave us depleted when we build our days on Him.

Before we part ways, let’s resolve to focus on what’s important.

Our faith.

Our family.

Our style.

Our children won’t be babies and toddlers forever, so seek to turn those exasperating moments into remembrance gems because things change, and all we have left are treasured memories of how things were. Also, let’s settle that whatever we did before we became wives and moms (that God called us to do) still has a place.

Discern where you are in this season and allow this moment to enhance your gifts, talents, and calling. Don’t mourn or grieve the past because our lives right now are golden.

Candace A. Jones
family preparing food in the kitchen
Photo by August de Richelieu on
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